Tuesday, June 9, 2009

DO OR DON'T TELL??

Once again, I was listening to Michael Baisden and there was a discussion as to what you would do if your best friend was getting married and the day before the wedding you saw her maid of honor and her groom-to-be in the most compromising of positions, cheating with one another. Or vice versa if you were a guy and saw your boy's bride-to-be fooling around with his best man. What would you do?? Would you tell them or would you keep that information to yourself??

The whole discussion was prompted by the fact that a woman actually outed a maid of honor on the radio show. There were a lot of differing opinions. Some people said the caller was wrong for that. Some people said you should mind your own business. Some people said you should confront the other spouse-to-be and insist that they tell what happened.

This is a tough call to make, particularly if it happened the night before the wedding but if the shoe was on the other foot and my best friend had seen my husband-to-be getting it on with my maid of honor, I would DEFINITELY want them to tell me and so I would probably do the same. Difficult, awkward and uncomfortable as it may be, I would tell. Who'd wanna marry that sleaze bag anyway, lol? But different people respond to things differently and you never know, you might be putting your friendship at risk. However, I think it would be worse if I found out later that my best friend knew and decided to say nothing!

All I can say is, hope it's a choice I never have to make....

12 comments:

Robyn said...

Hun
sometimes wat we dont know doesnt harm us

Shinks said...

Jackie,

Its been a minute since I vistied your blog, I know, how dare I, Sorry :(
But what prompted me was last week I was watching the Doha meet on Universal Sports and who did I see in one of thier commerial's taking a big jump into the sand in her Bahamas uniform? Well you of course. I don't know if you've seen the ad. Its only a split second, but its long enough for me to know it was you.
Very cool girl.

Jackie E. said...

KAREN!!!! Hey how's it going?? It definitely has been a minute since we've been in touch!! Oh, the good ol' days of rooming in Thessaloniki, Greece was it? and dealing with that crazy vaulter, lol:-( Let's not go there right.....

Hope you're doing well. I still stop by your blog off and on to check out how you're faring. Hope you and the hubby are good. Tell him I said hi and if I ever make it down to Atlanta, we'll definitely have to catch up. Take care my dear:-) and thanks for the info about the ad. Maybe i"ll see it later this summer.

anonymousnupe said...

No, please, tell us about "that crazy vaulter"!

But, yeah, if it's your boy/BFF, you have to tell. OR, you have to "force" the cheating parties to confess. They're both close to the groom or bride, so odds are many more opportunities to hook-up will present themselves during the course of the marriage. And once they've done it once it gets easier and easier down the line. It's destined to happen during the marriage. Yeah, nip that right in the bud.

(But run and get your vidcam first, before you do anything else, LOL!)

Jackie E. said...

Nupe: Mum's the word on the vaulter lol!!! What size tennis shoe does your daughter wear?

anonymousnupe said...

She's a 9 in sneaks, 9.5 for flats.

Sarah said...

Oh, your comment put a smile on my face! Thankyou! It is true, i am of the opinion that memories should help us grow, and not hold us back only reminding us of what was!
Tough question, and just like you i hope i NEVER find myself in a situation like that. I think i would confront the person, but in the end - it is between the bride and groom right? But at the same time - it's my friend, so it is at least a little bit of my business?
Ahh, now i am rambling.
Just sharing the thoughts ;)
Peace

Mizrepresent said...

I'm pretty sure i would tell despite the consequences of losing a good friend...see i believe marriage is important. One of the most important things we can do in our lives...it does no one good starting a flawed life, or one riddled with bs!

Gina said...

I believe that once you put an engagement ring on a woman's finger, all the sleeping around and getting in your last hook up ISN'T AN OPTION.

I'd want to be told...I've lived a lie before, and I'll never do it again. It's just too much work!!!

If a dude wants you, needs you, loves you, and is READY...he won't have to question his feelings for you by doing something so STUPID.

Jackie E. said...

Nupe: I was hoping she wore a 7.5-ish because I have sooo many pairs of Puma flats, I would've sent her a pair. I'm not surprised tho that her feet are not as small as mine.I find very few athletes' are. Sorry:-(

anonymousnupe said...

It's the thought! We appreciate you even considering my 'lil big foot.

12kyle said...

I'd have to tell. No matter what. When something happens like that before the wedding, you can assume that it's not the first time that it's happened.