I've competed in the Olympic Games 5 times. My experiences are immeasurable, my regrets are few....and I wouldn't trade them for all the world!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
ALL'S FAIR IN LOVE & CHILD SUPPORT?
Overheard: Guy talking to his friend, "I know I don't pay child support, but that shouldn't be a reason for her to stop me from seeing my child!"
His friend: "I know man, she's just hatin' on you cause you got another girl now so she's taking it out on you and Jamaal is the one who's suffering."
Guy: "Yeah man, I can't believe she would do that to him and make him pay for her jealousy."
His friend: "She's wack!"
So.....really? I was at a park the other day and overheard two guys having a conversation that basically went like that. And having thought about it, I'm still not sure what I think about it. Is a woman wrong for not letting her child's father see him because he's not paying child support? Particularly if he's able to and just choosing not to?
Is being allowed to be a parent to your child a right or a privilege? I think I can see both sides of this issue. On the one hand, if you're the woman and you're having to take on the entire responsibility of paying to take care of your child, it's probably hard to justify to yourself that the father "deserves" to be a part of his child's life.
However, on the other hand, and ideally, what is in the best interest of the child is probably to be allowed to have both parents in his or her life, no matter what, because the child doesn't care about who is or isn't paying. They just know that they don't get to see daddy or mommy, if the situation is reversed, and that time can never be regained.
It's just tough though I'm sure in reality to get over personal issues, feeling, lack of support, etc in order to keep the child's best interest a priority.
At the end day, the numbers of single parent households is on the rise and the number of fatherless kids is also on the rise. If you choose to have a child, you are also choosing by default to be there for that child both financially and emotionally, regardless. I don't have all the answers, and it's a difficult predicament, but I'm sure Jamaal could tell you pretty easily what he'd want if it were simply up to him. And when it comes to figuring it all out, maybe that's a good place to start.