BLOGGER FAMILY

I wrote a blog with this exact same title last year some time when I wrote about my friend Jewells. Initially, she was someone I only knew through commenting on one another's blogs, but last year when she was coming down to Orlando for a visit, we finally met and we have since become really good friends who chat frequently, laugh a lot and advise and counsel.

A couple weeks ago, another blog friend and family member, Kinta, messaged me on Facebook to let me know that she and her sister would be coming to LA for a few days for some fun, shopping and relaxation and that perhaps if time and schedules permitted, we should get together. It's been a pretty hectic week for me and I have a lot going on, but I definitely wanted to make the time to meet them both. Kinta has been a very supportive and consistent blog friend and has often commented on my blog, Dave's blog and Brianna's. Sometimes you can get a such a positive vibe from a person without ever even speaking to them, where you just get that feeling in your core that you are dealing with a good, sweet spirit. Such is the case with Kinta.

Anyway, last night after a VERY long day for me, I agreed to meet them both at the Xbar at the Hyatt Regency where they were staying. It was a really cool spot and we enjoyed great conversation, food and music and it felt as if we'd known each other for ages. She was how I imagined her to be....genuine and funny. She and her sister have such a great relationship and friendship and I was glad to share the time that I did with them.

We covered everything from The Housewives of ATL, to relationships, to track, to work and just had a good ol' time. I will be doing some traveling in the next few weeks coming up and one of the places I will be spending a few days is Atlanta and so we will definitely be getting together again. Once again, I just have to say how this blog has given me way more than I could have ever expected and I am grateful for that.

Here's a picture from our evening together last night.

ALL'S FAIR IN LOVE & CHILD SUPPORT?

Overheard: Guy talking to his friend, "I know I don't pay child support, but that shouldn't be a reason for her to stop me from seeing my child!"

His friend: "I know man, she's just hatin' on you cause you got another girl now so she's taking it out on you and Jamaal is the one who's suffering."

Guy: "Yeah man, I can't believe she would do that to him and make him pay for her jealousy."

His friend: "She's wack!"

So.....really? I was at a park the other day and overheard two guys having a conversation that basically went like that. And having thought about it, I'm still not sure what I think about it. Is a woman wrong for not letting her child's father see him because he's not paying child support? Particularly if he's able to and just choosing not to?

Is being allowed to be a parent to your child a right or a privilege? I think I can see both sides of this issue. On the one hand, if you're the woman and you're having to take on the entire responsibility of paying to take care of your child, it's probably hard to justify to yourself that the father "deserves" to be a part of his child's life.

However, on the other hand, and ideally, what is in the best interest of the child is probably to be allowed to have both parents in his or her life, no matter what, because the child doesn't care about who is or isn't paying. They just know that they don't get to see daddy or mommy, if the situation is reversed, and that time can never be regained.

It's just tough though I'm sure in reality to get over personal issues, feeling, lack of support, etc in order to keep the child's best interest a priority.

At the end day, the numbers of single parent households is on the rise and the number of fatherless kids is also on the rise. If you choose to have a child, you are also choosing by default to be there for that child both financially and emotionally, regardless. I don't have all the answers, and it's a difficult predicament, but I'm sure Jamaal could tell you pretty easily what he'd want if it were simply up to him. And when it comes to figuring it all out, maybe that's a good place to start.

HAPPY MOTHER's DAY LOIS!!!

For some reason in my family, my brother and I call our mother by her first name. Lois. It is also my second name. I cannot express sufficiently on here how much I admire my mother. She is one of those women that has been there for me WHENEVER I needed her. Before it was the thing to do, my mother traveled the world and lived in Africa, Trinidad, and Barbados before going back to Jamaica and getting married later on in life. We are as close as sisters and we get along really well. We are both pretty silly and we love to laugh and joke around with one another. I know that if I needed her she would be there for me no matter what. She, more than anyone has made me the woman that I am and so Lois, on this day, let me just say that I wouldn't trade you for all the world. HAPPY MOTHER's DAY and I wish you so many more!